What I realized, was that I just needed to take a break from action. I needed to be fully inactive, so that I could get back IN action. I have a burst of productivity, and feel refreshed and with a new perspective. Sometimes doing is just more doing, and a break is needed to get clear and regroup.

I was chatting with a client today about how crazed people can become during the holiday season. There is a hustle and bustle, that can rapidly turn into a horn-honking, impatient, competitive-ness, completely dousing any semblance of “holiday spirit.” Now, I am not proposing not to get gifts, if that is for you ( I choose to buy gifts for people year round, as the spirit moves me instead, rather than all at one time of the year, or even to eschew physical presents altogether), but I am suggesting to remember what is important at this time of year. The true present is in BEING present.

• Take a walk. Explore the holiday lights. Enjoy the chill of brisk air on your cheeks. If you live where it snows, enjoy your Winter Wonderland.
• Gather with friends. Only go to those events that truly move you, rather than out of “obligation.” Or better yet, hang out one-on-one for walks, hot chocolate dates, or lunches.
• Celebrate the darkness and go into the light. No matter what religious faith you are a part of, or are not a part of, most winter holiday celebrations revolve around the changing of the season, and the beginning of days getting longer and brighter. Fully embrace those “dark” parts of yourself, and celebrate what lights you up.
• Recognize the to-dos that you just may not get done this year. Table them for next year, and tackle them head on, no looking back or regretting what you haven’t done yet. (Most likely, no one but you knows the difference anyway

If you are wanting to make changes in your business. Use the natural time of slowing down at the end of the year to get clear about where you would like your business go. Crystallize how  you want to make a difference and who you want to reach. Focus on the true spirit of giving, which is why you are truly in business in the first place, and what you can “give” your clients, rather than how much you can “get” from them. They will appreciate being valued, and your business will be built on mutual giving and receiving.

And for some holiday siliness, here are some online suggestions to stay present to keeping it light, fun, and stress-free at this time of year.

• I have chosen to let it snow on my website through a plugin from Wibya, which is the toolbar at the bottom of my website. Any of you with a WordPress site can use this, or if I am designing a site for you, we can add this in.  http://www.getvirtuallyassistednow.com
• And, if you go to google.com and type in “let it snow,” your google browswer will snow too.
• And for one final bit of silliness, here is something I like to do every year, called Elf Yourself™, by Office Max.

Happy Hanukkah! Happy Winter Solstice! Happy Kwanzaa! Merry Christmas! Feliz Navidad, etc … Thank you for reading, and please share if the holiday spirit moves you!

There is value in taking time out. Some people I know work in the entertainment or event production industry, and work 18 hour days for months, and then take month-long vacations in tropical locales. Others work 10 hour days so they can have a 3 day weekend — every week. I took a time-out last week on a Tuesday, just because, and it felt simply decadent.

I was watching a silly sitcom in an imposed time-out today, and they were exploring the concept of the “man cave” — that theory that men need a place to go smoke cigars, drink beer, and do all manner of things “manly.” What the characters discovered, was that the women wanted a time out too once in a while. The “cave” became a place for adult time-outs. Two of the characters even ventured into their den of debauchery before work in the morning, danced the twist, and when their alarm went off, headed to work.

A colleague of mine posted about having a hard time focusing today. Some people believe in working for 90 minute stretches, and then taking a break. I read a suggestion from blogger Leo Baubata the other day about starting with an increment of 30 minutes on, and 10 minutes off, to form the habit of staying focused.

I took an afternoon off today, and am working later at night today, since that is what felt more productive to me. Listen to your own natural rhythms. Beat your own drum. When you are your own boss, no one is going to make you take a “time out” but you.

Wanting to share this fresh, green perspective, on the difference Apple has chosen to make when faced with a challenge from fellow blogger, Fredi Baker. I am in reverence today for the passing of a genius. It has moved me more than I could imagine. One day Apple is announcing the new iPhone 4S, and the next, it’s founder passes at the young age of 56. Steve Jobs, we already miss you …

Now, not only do I happen to be a Grey’s Anatomy fan, and get something valuable out of the message nearly every time I watch it, but I love the way this quote links fear with procrastination. Sometimes we use fear to validate our procrastination. Sometimes, we use procrastination to stave off our fears. The minute you take action toward something you are afraid of — even the tiniest micro-step — you are instantly moving beyond procrastination. The less procrastination you have to beat yourself up about, the less you have to fear.

I have always loved this definition of fear: F.E.A.R.: False Evidence Appearing Real. True, there are some fears based in reality. If you experience fear about jumping out of an airplane, riding on a motorcycle, or going to war, those are “rational” fears, as those are things that could threaten your very survival. Most of the fears we deal with on a daily basis are “irrational,” and not based in reality; they are based on our interpretation of experiences, and ways to avoid feeling hurt by them in the future. Fear of the unknown is the most unfounded of all, since how could you know what to be afraid of, if you don’t even know what will happen if you take action?

One technique that I found particularly helpful during a difficult time years ago, was from a book I read called Spiritual Divorce, by Debbie Ford. (It is a great read about transition and moving on from any obstacle, even if you are not going through a divorce.) She suggests to think of the worst. You think of the worst that could happen if you take a particular action. You walk yourself through the steps. She poses that simply breaking down your fears of the worst possible outcome give you freedom to accept the worst, and to make a choice and move forward.

Being afraid is valid. Being afraid is human. Being afraid is not a “reason” to not act. Simply resigning yourself to being afraid, and not giving yourself the opportunity to take action toward something you desire is selling yourself short. If you want to be in a relationship, but you are afraid you will get hurt, take at least one small action toward having what you want. Step by step, the fear will lessen. You will gain confidence.

I remember being a child, and having a fear of swallowing medication or vitamins. I was terrified I would choke. My pediatrician told me to try swallowing m & m’s™ candy pieces, because those were chocolate, and those “couldn’t hurt me.” Even at 10, I was hip to his reverse psychology. I resisted. I took liquids, chewables, and crushed pills. Then, years later, as an adult, I began taking supplements for my health. Somehow, some way, I got myself to swallow the pills. Now, I can swallow multiple pills at one time. I don’t even remember what it felt like to be so afraid to do this. I simply faced my fear one day, one step at a time.

I am definitely letting some of my fears dominate my time and attention lately. I have a fear related around not having enough, not being enough, or not doing enough. What would be the worst thing that could happen if my best was “not enough” for someone? I may get “fired,” or let go of? And then what would happen? I’d have to find another way to make income. And then I would. And then, I’d be completely okay in whatever new thing I chose. It’s much easier to face my fears when I approach them that way, instead of allowing them to consume me, approaching each interaction with anxiety.

I can go toward my dreams. I can boldly go forward, knowing that even if the worst were to happen, I’d adapt. I’d simply find a new way, a new path. I have amazing people supporting me in my life and I am very resourceful. I would probably do more than survive; I may even thrive.

Embrace your fears. Love them. Hug them. Know that you are not the only one that feels them. Know that it is completely okay to say you are afraid. It doesn’t make you “weak,” or “cowardly.” It just makes you know that you are living on the edge, and that you are alive.

* Inspired by this post from one of my favorite fellow bloggers, Leo Baubata: http://zenhabits.net/fearfuel/  “When you find the strength to act in the face of uncertainty, you till the soil of genius.”  Jonathan Fields, Author of Uncertainty: Turning Fear and Doubt into Fuel for Brilliance

Something about protest, to me, just feels off. It reminds me of that saying by Albert Einstein, “Problems cannot be solved by the same level of thinking that created them.”Being “against” something, in order to stir up change, often through peaceful protest, but with an aggressive, and rebellious tone, that often falls on deaf ears. As my friend used to say to her little girl when she was yelling in public, “I can’t hear you when you’re yelling.”

There is another group of people who are choosing to meditate near Wall Street. They are sitting down, and taking action, by being “that change they want to see,” as Gandhi put it. Leading by example, and being compassionate for the people you are appealing to, often has the most impact. Activism, can, too often, turn to acting out, expressing long-held resentments in ways that are too loud to hear.

While I support the spirit, and the courage of the people in the Occupy Wall Street protests, I am not willing to be an activist. I prefer the term “actionist.” I will take action, in whatever way I see fit, to create the best world I can to live in. It is my responsibility. It is not us against them. “They” are not the bad guys, and so I am choosing to up my compassion and acceptance, to inspire change through my own actions, as I support the actions of others.

The biggest one of these that had an effect, not only in its own changes, but in my ability to effectively share other changes, was the Facebook layout change. Many are irritated, with shouts of “why do you have to keep changing things,” and “what was wrong with the old layout?” If you have been on Facebook today, you know what I mean.

Technology is changing so rapidly, I find myself spending lots of my time — especially in my industry as a Virtual Administrative Consultant — just playing catch up. The inconvenience of the Facebook format changes were just another in a long list of “Who Moved My Cheese” type of moments that threw a glitch in my auto-pilot mode of working. I could have stopped, gotten frustrated, and blamed someone for changing a service that is free to me, which gives me no room to complain. Instead, I persevered, navigating my way through the changes, and even liking some of them.

To quote Heraclitus, “the only constant is change.” If we could just accept that the new model for reliability is change itself, we wouldn’t have to resist it so much. There is no “need” to change, but when change happens, why not change with it?

Also, be careful what you say. People are listening. With facebook, blogging, Twitter, and other social media making what we say have the ability to go “viral” and be “shared” with many people beyond our immediate network, there are people who know what you share if you put it out there publicly. They may call you on it. They may ask you about what you are up to the next time they bump into you.

Now how do you go about actually DOING what you say you are going to do? Is being committed enough? Is telling multiple people enough? The ego finds tricky ways to sneak out of commitments, when something isn’t going as planned, or it is not getting the recognition it wants or thinks it deserves. Be the boss of that ego. You are the one who made the commitment to something. When you feel yourself inching away from it — and it does not usually happen overnight — reach out. Ask for support. Read other blogs for inspiration. Make the time for something, as you said you would, and see how your life changes.

A friend of mine did a photo project a couple of years ago called 365. She is a photographer, and challenged by other Flickr-ites, she committed to take a self-portrait daily for a year. She also accompanied each other picture with some introspective writing. I was inspired by her when I took on writing every day for a year. I was excited to see what would open up for me. So then, why did I stop? I thought I was committed! I thought I could do it! I learned a great deal about what commitment is, and saw that when other commitments took priority, I gave up. I could have found creative ways to stay in my commitment, but my perfectionism would not allow me to do so. It was also my downfall.

All that being said, I am glad I gave up. I took time to revamp where I was going, and refurbish my website and branding. I am not giving myself permission to quit, I just knew that, at the time, I could not find a way to keep going. I now have a newfound compassion for people who fall off the wagon, or falter in their commitments. I see how I need to ask for support when I commit to something. I have more compassion for myself and the times when I’m not “perfect.” I am approaching life, through the added inspiration of my yoga practice, with equanimity, and acceptance as my motivation. “Just Do It!” is a great motto, made famous with a familiar swoosh, but “Doing What I Say” is my new motto.

“When will you ever have more time than you do right now?” Anonymous